So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize