singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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