My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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