my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
