does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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