We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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