White coat. Heels.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
