Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize