I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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