butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
