Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
