Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize