But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I want you more than these girls want KFC
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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