I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
