I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Ambien. No doubt about it.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
