Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
that's an acceptable place to lick
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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