if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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