Now he's lighting his socks on fire
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
