the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
