What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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