franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize