Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
