Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
