YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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