so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
His hands were made for my vagina.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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