ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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