Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize