So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
