I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
