I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
