if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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