they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
