i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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