I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I need moral support for this bender
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize