I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
whose ass print is on the piano?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
