Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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