Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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