I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
