All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
