Sry I called you an 8
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
