If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Jerry, you need to find god
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize