A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
