Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
