Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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