I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
