Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
