He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
