Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
