this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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