is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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