There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
