I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
