Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize
